Warlord of the North

Fuck it, let's have a LARP

The cold winter sun threw long shadows at sharp angles across the square. Dozens of pairs of feet dangled from a gallows erected along the back edge, a forest of limp forms clad in torn and dirtied suits twisting limply in the frigid wind. A shoe had fallen from one, revealing an incongruously cheerful rainbow sock. The camera panned slowly from one end of the square to the other, before focusing on the broken shell of the parliament building, one of its towers reduced to rubble, smoke still rising from shattered windows. From that direction a man came striding forward, heavy boots crunching through the crystallized snow, dark greatcoat billowing in the gusts that swirled about his bear-like frame, a red toque against the cold, mirrored ray-bans against the Sun, a bushy, icicled moustache slashing across his face. A flock of security drones orbited around him in precise formation, targeting lasers sweeping in all directions through the flurries.

As he approached the camera, he threw out his arms, a wide grin splitting his broad face, and boomed out in a rolling baritone, “My friends! Today, we celebrate! The war is over, and we won!”

The view switched to the feed from one of the drones, panning across a square packed with irregulars, militiamen, and civilians. A raucous cheer erupted from the crowd, waving their assault rifles and RPGs in the air.

The perspective switched back to the orator, who waved his hands for silence, then moved them behind his body to parade rest, projecting his barrel-like chest forward. “Today we celebrate not only the end of the war. We mark the beginning of a new era. Many of you are not doubt wondering what this will entail. Many of you are no doubt worried. You are right to wonder, for much will change; and some of you are right to worry. So, let’s discuss the changes.

“Our first order of business is to complete the deWEFication of our country. Over the last days, you have all watched as the worst, most prominent offenders were brought to justice, both here,” he gestured grandly, palm open and up, to the gallows to his right, “and in the provincial capitals. All were given a fair trial, and while the trials were conducted in absentia, the felons having refused to appear before our tribunals, the evidence was in every case clear and part of the public record. However, many of the members of this criminal gang remain at large, some known, others not. To those of you associated with the WEF, or with related organizations, we are coming for you. You may consider the time between now and your arrest a period of amnesty. Should you turn yourself in, and turn over whatever information you may have, you will be shown mercy. Otherwise....” he glanced towards the gallows, and shrugged.

“Comprehensive deWEFication is a necessary starting point to rejoining free humanity, as a sovereign people among sovereign peoples. Necessary, but not sufficient. We will also be dismantling all policies enacted by globalist agents acting against the interests of the nation.

“The era of mass immigration is now over. Our country has absorbed too many, in too short a time, and it has destablized our culture and impoverished our people. The borders will remain closed, for a generation at least, until recent arrivals have been fully assimilated.

“Those of you holding more than one citizenship will be required to choose. You will have three months to present evidence of having renounced any other passport you possess. If we don’t hear from you, we’ll assume that you’ve elected to renounce citizenship here, and will be invited to leave, as will be those on temporary, non-resident visas.

“Those of you who stay will be treated no differently from any other. And I mean that quite precisely – no differently. No worse, and no better than any other citizen. The days of special accommodations on the basis of ethnic background or religion are now over. There will be no special tax breaks for immigrant run businesses; no diversity hiring initiatives at government agencies or private corporations. You shall have no special advantages.

“Many within the public sector are employed within agencies whose primary aim has been the enforcement of discrimination against the native-born. You are no longer so employed, because as of this moment the agencies you work for no longer exist. Others in the public sector are employed enforcing compliance with these policies within their own agencies; you are now likewise surplus to requirements. We expect that your counterparts in the private sector will soon follow you into unemployment: with the government no longer enforcing these costly and counterproductive policies, no sane company will continue to employ you.

“Similarly, all policies aimed at preventing the weather from changing are hereby rescinded. The climate may be changing, but global warming is fake and gay. And even if it wasn’t,” he rubbed his arms theatrically, “Maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad thing. In any case, all state subsidy of so-called renewable energy technologies, ranging from wind and solar to electric vehicles, is over. There will be no more carbon tax on fuels. There will be no more regulatory interference with exploration, drilling, transport, and refining projects. Our goal is for our country to produce and refine its own energy, and to do so in such a way that maximally improves the quality of life of our citizens. We want money in your pockets, not in the pockets of con-men grifting off of globalist gangsters at your expense.

“Speaking of money, currency will no longer be issued in the form of promissory notes backed by interest-bearing debt. That was the economic mechanism by which our country, and indeed all countries around the world, were enslaved. The currency will now be backed by gold and silver; you may also settle your affairs using crypto. In any case, the government is no longer in the business of issuing money, nor will it allow private monopolies to do so. The stealth tax of inflation will no longer be allowed to steal the wealth of honest, hard-working folk.

“All controls on speech are hereby removed. Say what you will, online or off; speak against us, or in support of us, or about anything you want, as you please. It is not the state’s place to define official truth; indeed, it is not the place of any man or group to do so. The state will no longer demand that anyone defer to another’s sensibilities. It will no longer criminalize opinions. If someone’s speech offends you, that’s your problem – not ours.

“By extension, the state will no longer subsidize private or public media outlets. If no one wants to listen to what you have to say, if no one trusts you, consider the simple solution of not lying. In the age of the social network, people can decide for themselves who to listen to. Anyone with a camera, a microphone, and a computer can be a journalist, and these day’s that’s anyone. It is not the state’s business to gate-keep.

“Our goal is not only for our country to be free – it is also to be strong. Freedom without strength is impossible; strength without freedom, meaningless. Strength begins with you. A society is only as strong as the combined strength of its citizens; it is only free if that freedom starts at the bottom up, and permeates the social order. A nation internally composed of strong, free men, is a nation that can stand strong and free on the world stage. For too long we have been told the opposite! Liberalism has whispered sweet lies in our ears, telling us that freedom is to be found by indulging our weaknesses, in feeding the worst impulses of our nature, and in being kept safe from danger. Liberalism freed us from self-discipline, and so enslaved us to our vices; it strengthened that which is worst in us, and made us weak.

“Some of you may hear this rhetoric of strength and fear that we intend to be tyrants. Nothing could be further from the truth. To reassure you that this is not the case, I would like to announce two more areas in which the state will no longer impose upon you:

“First, all laws regulating the possession and carrying of weapons are hereby declared null and void. You may arm yourselves as heavily as you wish, both to defend yourselves against common criminals, and, if need be, the state. You are under no obligation to pass a background check or complete a safety course. The responsibility is on you not to misuse your weapons. Should another be injured or killed due to negligence on your part, you will be held to account as surely as if it were a premeditated act. Further, should you use weapons in the commission of a crime, your fellow citizens, and the police, are authorized to shoot you dead in the street like a dog.

“Armed men are free men. All beings great and small have their means of defense; the first order of business when enslaving or domesticating another creature is to remove its ability to defend itself. We do not intend to enslave you. We do not want you to be domesticated beasts of burden. The surest defense against conquest by foreign powers, or against tyranny at home, is an armed populace. A herd of sheep is easy prey; a pack of wolves is not.

“Second, and in recognition of today’s celebration, all laws restricting the sale and use of recreational substances are hereby lifted. It is not the state’s business to tell you what you can drink or smoke, or where you can drink or smoke it. Private property owners may of course have whatever rules they wish. Enjoy it, and suffer the consequences, as you will. There are, however, two exceptions to this policy, and they will be strictly enforced.”

A pair of irregulars with the arm-bands of the Restoration, clad in mismatched body armour, one in a motorcycle helmet and the other in a hockey helmet, both with rifles strapped across their backs, frog-marched a miserable-looking, pot-bellied middle-aged man across the square. The man was dressed in a button-up shirt and formal pants, and shivered visibly as the wind cut through the thin fabric.

“The first exception relates to opiods. We do not consider this class of drugs to be recreational. Due to the unique mechanism by which it rapidly induces an essentially inescapable physical dependence, we class opiods as a form of chemical warfare. For years now they have ravaged our land, destroying the lives not only of those who become addicted, but of their families and all those who watch helplessly as their loved ones descend into sickness, despair, and death. Opiods, therefore, are to remain illegal. They are, in fact, to become more illegal. Traffic in opiods is equivalent to murder, and will be treated accordingly.

“The man before you was until recently an executive officer at a large pharmaceutical corporation, one which made a handsome profit from the sale of generic synthetic opiods. This individual played a pivotal role in promotion and distribution. The evidence demonstrating this beyond any reasonable doubt has all been made publicly available. Under the institutionalized corruption of the old order, this was considered legal. We do not agree. Captain, if you please.”

In a single liquid motion, one of the irregulars drew a pistol, held it up to the former executive’s temple, and fired. The condemned collapsed to the ground, beside a spray of red on the snow.

“As you can see, your socioeconomic status is quite irrelevant to the justice you will receive. Anyone caught trafficking in opiods will be treated in the same fashion.

“The second class of drugs that will be prohibited are all forms of chemical birth control. Similarly, condoms, or other devices for the prevention of pregnancy, are not to be permitted. Abortion is furthermore to be treated as premeditated murder; doctors performing it will be prosecuted accordingly. The reason for these changes is simple: while our borders are to be closed to immigration, we intend for our population to expand by natural increase. We disagree with the globalists that there are too many people in the world; here at least, we have a great deal of space, and we intend to use it ... for us, for our sons and daughters ... not the sons and daughters of others.

“We will also begin policies designed to encourage our young people to start large families. This will involve escalating incentives, ranging from interest-free loans to life-long tax breaks, which will become more generous as family size increases. Our goal is for the birth-rate to increase above replacement levels, sufficient for natural increase to double our country’s population by the century’s end.

“A larger number of large families requires more young mothers. We will not force women into motherhood; it is up to each individual what path in life they choose. However, just as there will no longer be any special treatment for non-whites in the workplace, there will no longer be special encouragements or differences in standards designed to advantage women over men. In other words, the state will no longer incentivize women to choose career over motherhood. Ladies, if you can compete with the boys on an even playing field, good for you. If you find that you can’t, consider finding a good man and fulfilling the sacred role for which nature has uniquely endowed you.

“Strong families require a strong economic foundation. A free people cannot be truly free if the population is subject to the arbitrary mercies of huge, unaccountable corporations. We do not want an economy dominated by a small number of monopolistic interests; rather, we prefer an economy of small, independent, entrepreneurial businesses, where individual households are as self-sufficient as possible. We will therefore be removing regulatory and taxation burdens that disproportionately punish family businesses, and will instead turn our attentions on large enterprises involved in anti-competitive practices.

“In keeping with this philosophy of decentralization, we will reorganize our country’s internal political boundaries. As it stands, the various provinces are dominated by a few large cities, which due to their large populations exert a disproportionate influence on political policies. For rural citizens, this is intolerable: policies that work in an urban environment are usually nonsensical in the countryside. The reverse is also true. This cultural fault-line has been the source of the bulk of the conflict in our land, and it has been ruthlessly exploited by the globalist elements who until recently subjugated us. In the short term, all cities with populations in excess of five hundred thousand will henceforth be treated as independent provinces, with no legislative or regulatory authority over rural municipalities. Likewise, rural areas will have no influence over the cities. It is our hope that this will help to keep the peace between the two. In the long run, we will encourage the growth of villages, such that the majority of the population will ultimately live and work closer to nature, within organic communities operating at a more human scale.

“Finally, I’d like to say a few words about our nation’s economic development. We have been blessed with an abundance of natural resources, but for too long this abundance has been a curse. Our ruling class was lazy and complacent; they were happy to extract those resources in their rawest forms, and happy to allow foreign interests to retain the bulk of the profits. So rich was the flow of raw materials that they could grow fat from the skim. Meanwhile, industry at home was neglected and even punished. Citizens paid inflated prices for finished goods made from the very materials extracted from their own soil, while their incomes languished in an economy based on service, debt, and consumerism.

“No more. Trade policies will now be aimed at fostering domestic industries. The raw materials we extract, be it energy or minerals or lumber or whatever else, will be refined, processed, and turned into manufactured goods here at home. We will not be held hostage to global supply chains. No longer will the only jobs be in retail, administration, or marketing. We do not grow prosperous by doing one another’s laundry and selling one another goods manufactured on the other side of the world; prosperity is found by building and making, by working with our own hands and brains, by refashioning our corner of the world according to our own inclinations and tastes. And if our inclination is to keep our wilderness as unspoiled and beautiful as we can, it is the grossest hypocrisy to do this by simply moving the dirty parts out of sight and and out of mind to another country. We can do better than that, and we will.

“There is great wealth to be found in the north. Making use of it will require hard work and ingenuity. But just as we intend for that wealth to stay here, at home, those who contribute their blood and sweat to the great enterprise of building our land from within will keep the profits of their labours.

“There are many challenges ahead, but we are the sons and daughters of the men and women who carved civilization out of this wild and frozen land. The blood of heroes flows in our veins. We are equal to the task.

“My brothers and sisters, today I welcome you to this new age – to this renewed, great, white north, a land of truth, of freedom, and of strength.”